So. I've been reading. Alot.
About how a laugh boosts your endorphins, even if its forced. And how the best way to start working towards getting back to the BASIC basics (before meditating), is to start forcing your endorphins back up again.
So I've been forcing myself to laugh. For an extended period. Even if I get scared, I laugh.
It comes with a lot of nausea.
And defiance.
I don't do it until the midget is fast asleep because if feels like waves and WAVES of oily death are being chuckled out of me.
But there is a LOT to laugh at.
I again feel optimistic- ish.
Oh, and safety crush declined his perceived date invite after a few days of me avoiding him. I did not want to have that conversation.
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